Rules Schmules
03.17.2010 Someone who shall not be named, and no, it's not Voldemort, recently told one of my interns, "Vicky's a rule breaker." Among other things that also shall not be repeated here. Including, "She smells like rice" and "She eats carbs."
Worse things have been said about me. And to me. Like, "Shet up. Git out of here. You ain't got no bizness here," followed by the slapping of my Fox10 microphone out of my hand. Sorry, Mr. Meth Mouth, but we are on a public sidewalk shooting video of your crazy lab that done blowed up. It was a bad day for you, another day in the office for me. No need to hit the 5 foot 2 reporter standing in front of you.
But the rule breaker thing. That was meant as a teaching moment. Like, don't do X. That's how Vicky does it, but she's a "rule breaker."
I'm not so much offended as introspective. I work in an industry governed by competition and strategies and tactics and things I wish I had been told when I was an intern. That would have saved me at least 3 years worth of flinching and cringing when things went so terribly awkward.
"It's better to ask forgiveness than permission." Any journalist who says that's not true should be given a thorough mental health check. Or compete in a TV show about how to beat lie detectors.
"Don't ask, don't tell" ain't just for the gays. Getting the story is sometimes like sausage making. You love the sausage. You don't want to know that organ bits and clotted blood are mixed into the goods and wrapped up in a layer of pig intestines. Likewise, your producer loves the 'get,' but your producer also doesn't want to know about the messy and the cajoling and the fine line you walk in order to get your job done.
But as far as rule "breaking" goes, it's more of a rule "interpreting."
The Good Doctor says it's like standing in two lines at once. Something he restricts me from doing because he thinks it is total douchery. But there's no law against it. It's not #7 on a list of rules posted by the Duraflame logs. It's just an unspoken rule. That when you roll up to the checkout, you survey the shoppers ahead of you, avoiding the elderly and their checkbooks and the English as a Second Language and their coupons. You search for the cart that is least full and the customer who looks most capable of swiping their card and pressing the green "OK" button and signing with the stylus.
But if there's more than one person in your party, is it so wrong to divide and conquer? You stand there, I stand here. We each move up and whoever gets to the checker first, wins. A Nguyen win, I like to say. It's efficient and effective. No one is harmed by this technique. The person behind you either ends up waiting for you, as they expected, or they end up moving forward faster when you go to the other line.
It may be total douchery, but it's that attitude of working what your mama gave you that got my people over to these shores. All the Type A Vietnamese jumped on boats and they gave birth to a bunch of Type A kids. So here we are. Breaking rules left and right in the name of sausage making.
Reader Comments (4)
Vicky, I really miss you. Keep breaking rules
Rod!!!
The foxiest OOF producer I've ever worked with. I miss you too. But I relish those stories we did about dog testicle implants and dentistry dangers across the border. We'll always have our pet plastic surgery memories. Give Corrales a bro hug for me.
Vicky! Will do - Corrales is in Vegas with Ossher betting on the NCAA tourney (and doing God know what else). I hope they have enough gas money to get home. Ahh..neuticles, who could forget that one!
Neuticles! You have a mind like a steel trap. Hope Ossher and Corrales come back two pieces. Otherwise you're gonna have to go after them and it's gonna be the Fox version of The Hangover. Mwah mwah to you.