Vietnam: Living Like Locals

The whole time we traveled through Vietnam, I would think about The Good Doctor's parents and how they'd react to X, where X = crazy cab rides through Saigon, street food stalls with full intestines on display or fish so freshly caught they were literally jumping out of their plastic tubs onto the ground in front of you, or any number of smells and sights that are unlike anything in the U.S.

And I thought, "They could totally do this. They'd love it. I wish they were here." But what I kept saying to The Good Doctor was, "Oh my God. What do you think your parents would think about X?" "I so wish they were here so I could see their faces when X." "Can you even imagine how white your dad's knuckles would be holding on to this scooter seat?" "They would totally X if they Xed." No, it didn't get old. Not one bit. 

But the one thing I didn't think they'd quite survive, because I barely survived it, was eating dinner on the ground. Not just a quick snack or some popcorn. Full on, 5 course hot meals, all served and eaten on the floor. Why? Because there's no "Wine Country Party Rentals" in 'Nam. At least not for family gatherings. Plus, everyone's totally used to sitting on the ground and eating. And they're all under 5'6." 

It was hard enough for me to sit on the ground and eat hot food in 90 degree humid weather. Picturing The Good Doctor's side of the family, legs crossed Indian style on ceramic tile did seem a bit cruel and unusual.

By the way, yes that is my husband, sitting in the chair above me. He was at the "men and grown ups" table. Sweet baby corn. Only in Vietnam, Mister.

But he did have his turn on the floor as well. Again, sitting with the men, of course. And only the men are offered beer. We womenfolk get iced tea. 

He did well though. It's not easy to fold 6'6" into a small corner and also stuff yourself with food so as to make your hosts happy.

I'm thinking we'll do our next family meal Vietnamese style. You know, to get the in-laws ready for their turn. Maybe Thanksgiving. Picture this: turkey on the floor, separate the sexes, and alcohol for the men only. Fun times!

Vietnam: Rice Processing Plant

Not my finest work, as I had just gotten my new camera at the Vietnamese Best Buy and I didn't know I had to leave a ton of pad at the beginning and end of my recordings, or it would just cut them off 3 seconds earlier than anticipated.

Plus there's a bit of wind noise in the beginning. Now if that doesn't make you want to click on this video, I don't know what does. Naked Good Doctor acting out Ken Jeong's desert scene in The Hangover.

But here's a tour of my aunt's rice plant and home near Bac Lieu anyway.

Vietnam: Scootering 3

The final video in the scootering series. We were near Bac Lieu, visiting my mom's side of the family. Correction: I thought this was the same scooter that was there 18 years ago but as Asian Grandpa later schooled me, there's no way an 18 year old scooter would look that good or run that well.

Not sure when I'll actually get on a scooter again. Maybe I'll be giving Asian Grandpa a ride next time.

Vietnam: Kids

An assortment of photos of all the little chitlins running around during our visit. 

This is Vi--she's a year older than Emmy and a little firecracker.

The son and daughter of my cousin Hanh. We used to fight like cats and dogs when I visited. It's great to see her now. She and her husband own a trucking company with 5 big rigs. I don't know why her kids look Korean though.

This guy says his favorite food is spaghetti.

Something we noticed about Vietnamese boys--a lot of them seem to grow wide before they grow tall.

And this gal walked right up to us at a family dinner and said, "Hi, how are you?" and proceeded to chat with us in near perfect English. She studies in a special school in addition to her normal classes. Rotating teachers come in every few weeks, from England, Australia and the U.S. 

And randomly, her dad is the Vietnamese doppelganger of The Good Doctor's cousin Cody.

Vietnam: Feeding Emmy

Super stressful day after an important interview cancelled last minute. But this cheered me up. She looks like a little baby bird and, for a white boy, he has chopstick skillz.