Pregnant?

Dude, I had one night and day of vicious, spicy barfing and headaches and no fewer than 4 people asked in a 12 hour span, "Are you pregnant?" 

To which I say HELL NO ARE YOU NUTS? Except I didn't say that to my aunt because she's like a grandmother to me and I didn't say that to a co-worker because that would be rude, and I didn't say that to my friend because I used more expletive filled language.

But the short answer is: NO WAY IN HEEZY would I get pregnant right now. For so many many many reasons. Starting with, my birth control finally works without causing spotting every other day and I don't want to mess with a good thing. Followed closely by, I JUST stopped pumping, and I can't even THINK ABOUT starting the flow of milk from my boobs again please leave them alone milk gods, just let them be. Followed by, I've only been back to work since July or was it June, and my contract is up for renewal this June. Yes, I actually do think about these things when it comes to baby making. 

The biggest reason though, that I can't even fathom getting pregnant again right now, is because Emmy Pearl is barely 11 months old. Every time I even have one single aliquot of a thought about her future siblings, I just look at my #1 Baby and think, "It will be so sad when Emmy isn't our only baby anymore!" She is just way way too precious and special and barely even more than a tiny sprout and I would feel so super guilty bringing in another baby and disrupting the harmony of Mommy, Daddy, #1 Baby.

I mean, I don't want her to be an only child, because everyone knows how crazy only childs turn out to be, but I feel like I'd be a Traitor Mom for having another little pumpkin that will force Emmy to share her parents and her snacks and her snoggies that she loves so much. I know it's impossible for Emmy not to be an only child without having siblings, and that I'm being totally irrational, but there's no way for me to have another chitlin' right now. It would feel totally wrong. And that is so weird because I know that we want to have at least two kids and we're going to read all those techniques for how to try for a boy next time, I think it involves head stands, OH GOODY. But for now, whoa Nelly. To even IMAGINE being pregnant and all the horrible nausea and crankiness and pinched nerves and 41 pounds of weight gain while chasing Emmy around and hugging her and loving her and giving her big ole bear hugs...those two things just do not go together like peanut butter and jelly. 

I'm hoping this feeling evolves when it's the right time to add another babycake to the mix but right now I ain't got no flour or sugar or eggs and the car is broke down and the store is being re-built after it was taken out by a tornado. So in short, I'm not pregnant. I think it was just a bad burrito.

Vicky NguyenBloggity, Parenting